So I love Dallin more than anything in the world and I feel very fortunate to have him as my child. But boy oh boy has he been difficult lately. Or maybe I have been difficult. He is happy and I am the one who has the problem with change. Maybe terrible two's only exist for Mom's & Pops. He is so indipendent now and knows exactly what he wants. He told me today for the first time "NO mom, No!" I was like excuse me! But then again who taught him to say no? Me! So perhaps I am the one who has the problem. What mother doesn't want their children to grow up as independant and decisive individuals? My parenting book says it is just a transition stage from baby to child and that I need to let him make his own choices. I guess its just hard when your baby grows up. I cherish the time now when he hugs and kisses me and sits on my lap and coudles. They just don't happen as often anymore. Hope he will decide he misses them one day too.
I think the hardest part for me in the last few days have been the lack of sleep. He has learned how to get down from his big boy bed now and decided that means he doesn't have to go to sleep till he wants. which means bedtime is around 12, 2, or 3. I have been so tired. I have had to shut the door to his room and let him just cry it out. It breaks my heart. Speaking of which he is crying right now. I usually cry when he does. I don't want him to feel like I am abandoning him or something. It really tares me down when he cries. I just want him to go to sleep on his own at a reasonable hour. I need time at night to re-coop and relax. I don't think matt and I have had more than 20 minutes together to talk in the last 4 days. Its so difficult never getting to spend time with him. Never being able to go to the park as a family or watch a movie together or go to the temple together. I feel like a single parent. It is so hard for me to do everything on my own. This summer the Lord is really teaching me patience, and I am greatful for that because I know it will come in hand later.
I am greatful for the time I have been able to spend with Dallin tho. I know it won't always be just me and him so this is time I love and enjoy. He is truly my best friend. I also have made some pretty cool ladies out here. All the APX wives are awsome. We really have a blast hangin out. I am so glad they are here to support each other while we are all going thru the same thing.
This is defenitly a time in my life that I will never forget.
Privacy please!!!
14 years ago
2 comments:
oh gosh - so know what you mean.
terrible two's, is, well, terrible.
Grace said NO MOM all the freakin' time. I was at my wits end. I didn't want to be a mean mom, but she needed to learn. So I prayed (sometimes it's hard for me to remember, but HF knows these kids better then we do, and he knows what they need) specifically for an answer about how to get grace to stop saying no. My answer? I needed to say YES to her more often. Not as in, give her everything she asks for, but when she says "Mommy?" instead of my usual "What?" I needed to say "Yes, dear?" She said mommy about 50 times a day, so I ended up saying yes about 50 times day. It took about a week and the NO MOM days were over. Yeh, she still does it here and there, but not like she did before.
I hate letting kids cry. it's hard. but you gotta do it. We gave grace 3 trys. If she got out of bed a 3rd time, we'd tell her we were going to shut her door. if she came out again - we'd close it for the rest of the night. once again...only took a few nights for her to get the idea of staying in bed.
this is long. sorry. just some thoughts, since I've dealt with the exact same feelings and issues. Good luck. you're a good mom. You'll know what your lil' guy needs.
Your comments always help me so much. I need to know i am not the only one going thru it and that other moms are finding sucess with the way they dicipline. Thanks :)
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